So i am laying here on this unconfortable bed in the hospital and yet i feel even more un easy even if the bf is sleeping next to me. I dont like this… i feel soo alone and sad :(

I miss you guys :) iiT’S BEEN LiiKE 165468415631 DAYS SiiNCE ii LAST SAW yOU GUyS PS ii HAVE SOMETHiiNG COMiiNG UP HIT ME UP ON A  MESSAGE ER EMAiL MEE ER SOMETHING. ii LIKE REALLY MISS yOU GuyS

xoxoillest:

Has fights. Has trust. Has faith. Has tears. Has hurt. Has sweet smiles. Has genuine laughter. Has snorts because of the laughter. Has weird, stupid, unnecessary arguments. Has patience. Has communication. Has secrets. Has jealousy. And most importantly, love. This is all just a mess that turns out beautiful&an experience that can never be forgotten.

xkaaaylene:

Sigh why….

 ugh I noe right it happens … but alot of the time they freaking just wont listen to you

you knoe I fell in love after hearing this

Why is it that right when I am about to fix things, something ends up backfiring at me? Like saying ” awww I love you babe, & I miss you soooo much.” but in the inside of me it says ” ewww you said that?” or like I hold a silence for a while and then I get all worked up about it, but in the end I end up saying its whatever right, and then say babe I cant be mad at you for to long. I didnt even know that my anger can get worse every time im in a relationship or is it just my stubbornness the problem.In truth i already know the problem. The problem is not how i was raised or who made me grown so attached to them, but all the fault is me. My stubbornness for not acceptance, my stubbornness in listening, the stubbornness in believing and most of all stubbornnessin loving. I can’t love someone for too long cause I know I will hurt them either way. But my reason right now is far more great than I already know. So all i can say is that, at least you can go without no worries. All I can say now is that All a said could be out of anger or not control. ha heck like you said maybe I am immature. Well you know as well your in fault as well, your safety and mine. You got me all worked up when you didntlisten to me when things are getting out of hand, it was reckless. But in the end you say ” whats done is done? Really ? Thats all you have to say? The least you could have done was saying ” sorry for making you scared. Sorry for not making sure things were safe.” You know I care so much about you. But if worrying if things are okay or safe or what not, is not going to work out for you, then my CARING SOOOOO much for YOU is worthless and meaningless you didn’t understand.

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/simplyedralyn

My day was great. Had an interesting morning with my cousins and brother, but when he came over I felt as if someone has stabbed me so many times that I’m ready to fall but I hold back the pain. We sang and laugh, but he sits sad on the sofa look’ all sad. After getting some food A few words spoken that hit me. ” I wanna tell him that if hes leaving he should distance from you. So that you wouldn’t be hurt. Ive seen you hurt to many times and I don’t want to see you cry again. If hes really going to go I want you to ease off from him.” These words hurt too much that looking at him would hurt too. I say I am okay and that nothing is wrong, but how am I going to tell him this, I don’t want to be the reason of him not going because of my selfishness. When he left I burst into tears because I love him and miss him too much. I love him so much that he is not just my world but he is also my EVERYTHING.